20050629

1525 hrs June 29th 2005

I have not been blogging,

been trying to wean myself off

the horrible side effects

of Risperdal.

That drug is terrible,

just a short term solution,

to a longer term problem.

Which is in effect opposite

to my situation with Ms X.

Attempting long term solutions,

to short term problems.

Risperdal is so damned addictive,

I had to increase the dosage

all the time.

As the effects wear off,

the anxiety attacks,

the pounding heart,

the cold sweat,

the imaginary friends,

they all come back.

Neurosis is a strange thing.

The fear

of an eventuality

is actually worse

than the eventuality

itself.

Humans are resilient

we do adapt

to eventualities

and the fear

is mostly

overblown.